Friday, September 25, 2009

Seattle Signing Update

A huge thank you to Jason at the Borders in Redmond, WA and to Danielle at the University of Washington Bookstore in the U-District. You were both an enormous pleasure to work with, and I'm so glad to have met you. Also, thank you very much to the lovely women I talked to - both in Redmond and in Seattle, and who attended my events.

It was a very surreal experience signing books at a real bookstore, and seeing my name on promotional materials. I don't know if I'll ever get used to that. I've been dreaming (like every author on the planet) of seeing my name on a book in bookstores, and now that it's finally here I keep waiting for someone to shake me awake. It's so unbelievably rad seeing your dream come true.

Of course, now the dream has been updated to wanting complete and utter market saturation... :-)

The picture is of me next to the stand at the front entrance of the Borders in Redmond. I also snagged the huge banner with my name on it for my living room wall. You only get to have your first book signings once.

Yours in dream-achievement,

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I just walked up to this guy and used one of your openers and it was really awkward. What did I do wrong?

If you just “walked up to a guy”, chances are the getting proximity part of the equation needs a little work. Just walking up to someone directly conveys interest. He knew you were interested before you even started talking, which is not neutral and therefore not what you're going for.

You need a natural way to get near someone, with an obvious other reason why you are there besides him. In bars, get a drink or be on your way to the jukebox. In coffee shops, be on your way to the bathroom or sit near the guy you want to talk to with your newspaper. In any store, just pretend to be totally interested in whatever product is near him. On the street (or in a mall or wherever) it is fine to stop someone and ask them a question (i.e. open them), but you need to be walking near them before-hand.

Yours in proximity,

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Does this only work at bars or can I do this anywhere?

I’ve focused a lot on bars and clubs because they are can be easy places to meet new people. You can go out with your friends (or by yourself), have a fun time AND potentially meet great guys. Plus, there are lots of guys all in the same place so you don’t have to spend as much time looking for them. If it's a Friday or a Saturday night, there's a good chance the guys you meet will be single. Plus, no one is in a hurry to get somewhere else because they are all out to socialize anyway.

However, bars aren't for everyone. And that’s fine.

You can absolutely use these principles anywhere. Bookstores, coffee shops, at your Team in Training meeting, on the street, in the park, on the beach, in your photography class, at the driving range: pretty much anywhere you feel safe and there are good looking guys to talk to is fair game.

Yours in ubiquitous conversation,

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Screw Cupid on Seattle's KING 5 "Morning News"

I'd like to give a huge thank you to the crew at KING 5's "Morning News" for making my first live TV appearance as painless as humanly possible. It was a pleasure and an honor to be interviewed, and I enjoyed myself thoroughly. I am especially happy I didn't throw up from nerves, contrary to what the epileptic butterflies in my stomach were suggesting the morning of.

The lovely Joyce Taylor from the "Morning News" team interviewed me, and did a great job, as you can see on the clip of my interview here.

The two coolest things about being a news station's studio? 1) The cameras are on robots that move around the studio on their own. Who knew! and 2) Major respect to those who report the weather on live TV in front of a green screen. If I was gesturing in front of a blank screen about the weather in West Seattle, I'd probably be pointing at Alaska... He did it flawlessly. Well done!

Now - off to my first book signing in the Redmond, WA Borders at 7pm!

Yours in non-nausea,

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Is this something I can do alone?

By all means, YES!! As you probably noticed, some of the openers I mention in Screw Cupid require that you're with some friends to make sense. But you can adapt most of them to use by yourself. For example, instead of saying, "My friend and I were wondering...", you can say, “Could you help me out with something? I just got off the phone with my girl friend and she was wondering...”.

Also, depending on your personality, you may prefer going out and doing this by yourself. I personally find it can be a fun change to going out with my girl friends. I feel like I have more freedom to cruise the room and talk to whoever I want. Plus, I tend to worry about whether or not my friend is enjoying herself when she’s “taking one for the team” and talking to the non-hot friend of the Hot Guy I’m talking to.

If you have a free Tuesday evening but none of your girlfriends are in the mood to go out, just go out by yourself. If anyone asks where your friends are, just say your friends are “on their way”. No one will be the wiser but you.

Yours in solitary fun,

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Pacific Northwest Bookseller's Association (PNBA) Conference "Nightcapper" in Portland - aka My First Book Signing!!

I had the honor of being one of 20 authors selected for the Pacific Northwest Bookseller's Association's ( 2nd Annual "Nightcapper" event last night in Portland, OR. Beyond it being a fantastic event...

It was my first signing!

Signing my first book for an actual person (not related to me...) is now 2nd on my all-time favorites list of being an author. The first was receiving the first copy in the mail and holding my book in my hands, shiny cover and all. Signing books? Awesome #2. I was in excellent company at the event, and it was a pleasure to meet so many booksellers from all over the region.

The response at PNBA to "Screw Cupid" was great - everyone who came up and talked to us thought the title was awesome, and everyone loved the cover. Our table was dominated by the day-glo pink of the book cover, which made us stand out from the crowd and fortunately is a flattering color for both my editor and I. :-)

A very big thank you to the staff at PNBA for putting on such a great event, and for making my first signing experience such a pleasurable one.

Fun story from the drive back to Seattle from Portland in the wee hours of the night:

I stopped to fill my beater of a car's gas tank in a town called Cougar in southern Washington. I get out to swipe my card and put the gas nozzle in the hole, when I hear a hissed "Hey!" from the gas attendant's booth. Upon closer examination, she had opened up the door to her booth about 4 inches and was saying something to me. I walked closer to hear better.

I kid you not, this is what she said:

"Hey. You might want to sit in your car while you fill up. We just heard on the radio that a cougar is wandering around the neighborhood. They like to attack. " She pulled the door shut and went back to her business of cashiering.

A cougar in Cougar, WA...that likes to attack. Rad.

I finished my gas pumping business unassaulted by large felines, but needless to say, was glad to get back in my car unscathed.

Next up in the world of Screw Cupid is preparing for my first public book signing next week at the Borders in Redmond, WA and preparing for my live interview on KING TV's "Morning News" on Thursday at 8:20am.

Yours in sunny, non-cougar infested Seattle,

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Should I make eye contact before I approach a guy?


Making eye contact
constitutes flirting, and flirting translates to “I’m interested in you. Your point is to get close to him (i.e. get proximity) without him knowing so that you can ask your question. Getting “accidental” proximity would be impossible if you had made eye contact with your target before-hand. He would know for sure that you didn’t just “happen” to slide into the bar to get your drink right next to him. Whereas, if no eye contact has been made before you get proximity and deliver your opener, there is no tip off to him at all that you are interested in him. He may have noticed you and tried to make eye contact with you before this point, but you will have been strong and not let on that you thought he was your kind of Hot Guy.

Caveat: checking him out when you are sure he’s not looking to make sure he’s cute is more than fine.

Yours in sly peeking,